autumn in New York

Here is a recap of my October. Enjoy!

art for art’s sake

A good article about “Art and the Church” by Kevin DeYoung.

Thank you Lindsey for sharing it with me.

Enjoy.

the human condition

I have learned that every piece of art an artist makes will ultimately come down to one of these four subjects:

Heaven, Hell, Humanity in the Garden of Eden and Humanity after the Fall.

And most great artists have successfully commented on all four subjects through out their life and career.

Thoughts?

and as gold is refined through fire

How odd it is that as a Christian grows, they get sadder and more joyful at the same time. They only continue to experience their own sufferings and see the worlds pain more and more. How can that not grieve them? But as a response to the pain and grief they feel, they are driven more firmly into their eternal hope, deeply rooted in Christ, and they come out with a heart that is stronger, more joyful, and more in love with Christ then ever before.  Just as gold comes out better through the fire.

How truly sweet it is to be refined- to have a Father that implants characters of His own heart into mine and teaches me to put my hope in eternal hope and not in my present circumstances. He loves me enough to take time to make me whole and without blemish, pure as snow, and more beautiful than gold.

And because of that, I am greatly humbled.

sweet disposition

A glance into my life in New York and my trip to Asheville NC.
Enjoy.

(video to Heartbeats by Jose Gonzalez)

from the Blue Ridge Mountains back to the Empire State Building

Growing up, I only saw myself moving to New York City and living here. Loving and thriving in this big city. I would get chills just dreaming about the city and all that it had to offer to me. I knew I was born for New York.

I spent this last weekend in Asheville NC with some dear friends. Hiking the Blue Ridge Mountains, spending time outside in the fresh air, falling asleep to the sound of crickets and not police sirens. As much as I am enjoying New York, I dont think I was made for it. I dont think I could move here and start a life here, thrive and be inspired here.

But dont worry, Im still going to give it a fair chance.

we are His treasure

“All our ‘bad things’ will turn out ultimately for good. All our ‘good things’ -Christ, salvation- will never be taken away, and the best things are yet to come.”

From Tim Kellers sermon yesterday, Hope for the World, starting off Redeemers’ RENEW campaign. I highly recommend this sermon.

I am so excited to invest in Redeemer, and gain a bigger heart and vision for this city.

today is the first day that I have ever wanted to give up on art.

If there is one thing I am seeing, and saw clearly today after critique, is that the journey of art is like the journey of life. Its painful, and exposing, vulnerable and makes you ache. Nothing about it is safe, or comfortable. It can bring massive amounts of joy and massive amounts of tears, and as long as we are on this earth the journey will be painful and rough at times, or until I get to heaven, and finally understand art, creating and beauty for what it is truly meant to be.

I have a lot to learn, and so much further to walk. And today I saw that, through my own art, and I wanted to flee and pursue something easier, less painful, less personal and possibly practical.

But I suppose art, like life, is only a shadow of the things to come. So no matter how much I give up, or want to, He never will.

i thought that these sorts of things were only supposed to happen to Christel.

Some awkward moments thus far in New York:

1. Without fail, while I am on the subway the person to my left will slowly start nodding off, their mouth will fall open and a few moments later they are sleeping on my shoulder. No lie. I have had everything from an elderly women to an over weight latino man with a really nasty mustache sleeping on my shoulder. Its incredibly awkward.

2. I can never seem to make the two block walk from the subway to the studio without getting ATTACKED by people on the side of the street selling perfume. I feel like I am wearing a sign that reads “Please SPRAY me with all the stolen perfume you are selling.” By the time I get to the studio I am wearing Channel No 5, Juicy Couture, Vera Wang, and I smell absolutely wretched. I walk in the studio and I get comments like, “WOAH. Who went overboard?” Sorry guys, its me… I just love smelling like trash.

3. During Fashions Night Out, while I was at the Burgdorff Goodman party, I was mistaken by a VERY old and VERY drunk man, to be Lindsey Lohan (epic FML in itself). He stood up and took my hand into his own and asked me to be his girlfriend and said that he would buy me a mansion in France and a yacht for the summer.

starbucks is my new home.

If someone were to hand me a plane ticket back to minneapolis right now, i would take it. I would be on that first plane home. The only reason I am still here, is because I know that God has me here.

Im starting to believe that this time in New York is not about art. Dont get me wrong, I am learning a lot about art- viewing art, what it means to be an artist, absolutes in beauty, etc. But times like this are never just face value.

I have loved catching up with people and staying updated on minneapolis life and the many happenings of Heritage 301, but I have also found it to be a mixture of emotions, knowing that when i hang up the phone, or close out of ichat, we will all go on to live our lives and i will get thrown back into life here in this city without familiar and comfortable things and people. Life here is becoming so normal, but still feels so shocking.

I find myself aching for (and going to a lot) places like Starbucks, McDonalds and Target. Because they are normal, they are Minneapolis. I know how they work and smell, and what they look like.

Its a funny thing, being homesick, and its funny that this is the first time in my life that I have ever been homesick. But I cant decide- is homesick the place, or the people?